Analects of Blue

24 September 2005

Blue and the Odd Sensation

Another poem by me.
Any relationship to actual events or persons is most likely intended. Sue me.

Blue and the Odd Sensation

There was a boy named Blue.
Who once thought he'd fallen in love so true.
- he'd rather have died of the avian flu -
He hadn't the faintest clue as to what he ought to do.

So he asked his mother...
Then he asked his brother...
And then he asked yet another...

But none of them could help explain
why Blue was in such awful pain.

He went to school.
He went to work.
He even often went to church.

Regardless of where he went,
irrespective of what he did,
his mind would never him appease.
He always felt ill at ease.

He yelled and screamed.
He danced and played.
He hoped and prayed
for this love, from him, to be unchained.

Then in the end,
just 'round the bend,
he sat and thought things through.
"Perhaps I'm daft. Perhaps I'm silly.
Perhaps I've never really even been all that much in love with Billy."

And so Blue went on his merry way,
laughing, skipping, all through the day,
feigning to love in the exact same way,
just as the other children play.

~ The Not-so-Tidy (and Rather Convoluted) End ~

19 September 2005

Aye, aye matey!

For those of you unfortunate souls that missed the best National Talk Like a Pirate Day party in the south of Provo, here are a few photos of the fun and excitement you weren't able to participate in.

Be thar' next yar' matey, or it'll be the plank for ya! ARGH! I'll chew yur ear off!

18 September 2005

T-Shirt Revolution

T-shirts have been the bane of my laundry folding life for as long as I can remember. But now, thanks to Martha Stewart, I am saved. No more trying to figure out how to correctly fold my t-shirts. No more mismatched folds in the shirts. No, Martha has cleansed the inner vessel of my bureau. I have just spent an hour refolding every t-shirt in my bedroom. They are beautiful. A work of art. From bane to nirvana in one fell pinch. My life, and my drawers, will never be the same. Thank you Martha.

To discover the fine art of easy t-shirt folding for yourself follow the link below, and click on "Folding a T-shirt 101 with Susan Lucci."

16 September 2005

Dirty Laundry

Here, as suggested by bamabeau, are a few of my favorite things.

Drama Queens
1. Britney Spears
2. Elizabeth Taylor
3. Keri Ann Margaret

Works of Art
1. The Thinker by Rodin
2. Bellagio Ceiling by Chihuly
3. David by Michelangelo

Department Stores
1. Neiman Marcus, Union Square, San Francisco
2. Boyds Philadelphia
3. ZCMI, Downtown, Salt Lake City

Country Names
1. Bahrain
2. Confoederatio Helvetica
3. Prussia

Brands of Chocolate Treats
1. Godiva
2. Nutella
3. Ghirardelli

Pieces of Clothing
1. Boa/Scarf
2. Button-up casual shirts
3. Neck tie

1. Teufelsbrueck, Hamburg, Germany
2. Santa Monica Pier, Santa Monica, CA
3. Sunset Point, Bryce Canyon, UT

TV Shows
1. Jack and Bobby
2. The Mary Tyler Moore Show
3. Wonder Woman

Comic Book Heroes

1. Batman
2. Wonder Woman
3. Spiderman

Buildings That I Have Seen
1. San Diego Temple, LDS Church, San Diego, CA
2. The Chrysler Building, Manhattan, NY
3. Grandpa's house, Paragonah, UT

Modes of Transportation
1. Walking on my own two feet
2. Train
3. Bicycle

Traits in a Spouse
1. Humorous
2. Introspective
3. Photogenic


1. Nicole Kidman
2. Nicole Kidman
3. Nicole Kidman

Actors to stare at
1. Chris O'Donnell
2. Mark Wahlberg
3. Val Kilmer

Actors that can act
1. Paul Newman
2. Mel Gibson
3. Jake Gyllenhaal

Doc (or Mock) umentaries
1. The Battle Over Citizen Kane
2. People Like Us: Social Class in America
3. Medusa: Dare to Be Truthful

Things to do with my mouth
1. Kiss
2. Talk
3. Eat chocolate

Things to do with (or have done to) my feet
1. Dance
2. Walk
3. Massage

1. "Optimism may make you look stupid some of the time, but pessimism always makes you pessimistic" -Someone listed on the inside of an HonesTea bottle cap
2. "Be yourself, but be your better self." -Karl G. Maeser, as quoted by J. Golden Kimball
3. "Always leave it better than when you found it." -My mother

Small Appliance Brands

1. Bosch
2. Kitchen-Aid
3. Krups

Schools of Design

1. Bauhaus
2. Frank Lloyd Wright
3. Italian High Renaissance

Patrons and Philanthropists
1. Lorenzo de Medici
2. Andrew Carnegie
3. Meyer Guggenheim, and his family

04 September 2005

A poem

This poem was written while eating lunch in a park. The feelings expressed in the poem are really what I was feeling. Luckily, my lunch ended much more pleasantly than the poem.

I don't often write poetry. Thus, I don't really know what makes good poetry. But the few people that I have read this poem to have found it slightly amusing.
So, here it goes:

Desecration by Seagull

Sweet brown rice, with mass appeal
I sit to eat my favorite meal.
at the park,
on the bench,
I'll have it down, in a cinch.

The rolling river,
The golden sun,
The weeping willows:
This day's a plum.

The wind, he blows,
and on that breeze
the seagulls please
to swoop right down upon the ground.
All sweet and innocent, I should think,
these birds that dwell around the sea.

Here they come,
first one by one,
then two by two,
they begin to circle 'round me and you.

How picturesque it seems to me,
like something from a childhood dream.
Lower and lower, around they come
until they're nibbling at my thumb!

The beasts! The horror!
I can not bear
as they begin to rip and tear.

First fork they pull from my hand
And then begin to flit and fan.
As now the rice is gone you see,
they've nothing left to eat, but me!

Seagulls on Antelope Island
(not the same beasts that inspired the poem)